10 JOKES ,, ALL FUNNY AS F**K

1 - I went to the bulimia society staff party last night, the place was heaving

2 – I stole the collection box from the epilepsy centre yesterday, they going to have a f*****g  fit when they find out.

3 – My Italian friend is opening a funeral parlour, and hes going to call it pasta-away.

4 – My grandad said to me today, its going to be a nightmare ths winter with the flu epidemic,

I know i said “tell me something i dont know “ ok he said your nans arse can take my whole fist.

5 – they reckon beer contains womens hormons,think they my be right ,because after 8 pints i talk shit and cant drive.

6 – i dont know whats more disturbing, my mother telling me my sister is a lesbian ,or my father winking at me and saying , no shes not.

8 – my mate came up to me today all excited saying ,guess what im shagging twins.

No way i said how can you tell them apart, thats easy he said tracy has huge tits and dave has got a moustace.

9 – guy goes to the doctors with hearing difficulties, dr says before i can examine you can you describe the symptoms, no problem he says ,homer is a fat lazy,yellow guy,and marge is a skinny bird with blue hair.

10 – honestley some people take offence at anything ,i met a guy at the bus stop today with no legs and all i said was “ how you getting on “.